#5 Single Player Sports

Chinese people have never been great at team sports. That’s why you don’t see many Chinese folks playing American football, basketball, soccer, or baseball. The Chinese just aren’t physically big enough to compete in many of these sports. The Chinese are known for their minds not their physical attributes.

You figure that out of a country of one billion plus people, they could create more than a handful of professional athletes in US team sports.  I can only think of a handful.  You have Yao Ming (Houston Rockets) and Yi Jianlian (Washington Wizards) in basketball (also American born Jeremy Lin – Golden State Warriors), Chien-Ming Wang of the Washington Nationals in baseball.  Yao’s career is about over and Yi is a marginal basketball player for the Washington Wizards.  Besides Yao Ming, there really isn’t any big Chinese athletes in team sports. And trust me, Yao is not your average Chinese person. He just happens to be 7’6″ and has incredible athleticism. Can you name more than three professional Chinese team athletes NOT playing in China?

Let’s turn this around and look at non-team sports. The Chinese have incredible athletes in sports like diving, gymnastics, table tennis (ping-pong), shooting, and ice skating. So why are the Chinese only good at one person sports?  It’s because you use your  mind in these sports.  You use your concentration and finesse.  You outsmart your opponents.   I don’t watch a lot of these non-team sports except during the Olympics but I can probably name more than 3 athletes in these sports – You have Michelle Kwan in skating, Yani Tseng in LPGA golf, Liu Xiang, the Chinese hurdler, Michelle Chang in tennis, Li Na in women’s tennis…. that’s about all can name as I don’t watch a ton of one-man sports.

Michelle Kwan

Arguably the greatest ice skater of all time.

Going back to my original comment, out of a billion people, you would think that we can produce some world class athletes.  Let’s see how many you can name.

#4 Identify Other Asians

Most people other than Chinese people will never understand this.  Whenever Chinese people see another asian – Korean, Japanese, Chinese, Taiwanese, Thai, mixed, etc…. They will almost always immediately identify what race that person is.  For example, if a Chinese person was watching TV and saw a person of Asian descent, he would say, “He’s Korean.”  Sometimes there’s disappointment because this person is not of the same race, especially if that Korean has done something good for society.  Like you’ll see KJ Choi win a major golf tournament and the Chinese person would be very happy to know that he’s “one of us.”  But in the case of someone like Korean Sung Choi Hui, the maniac who shot up Virginia Tech, the Chinese person would immediately say “(thank god), He’s Korean.”  This doesn’t have to be on TV, but it could be on the streets, in cars, pictures in magazines, on Jeopardy, or anywhere.  The Chinese person just loves to be able to identify which Asian ethnicity this person is from.  One other major reason for this is because the Caucasian is never able to identify the race.  The almost always say “that person is Chinese.”  Even if the person has a last name like “Kim,” the white man will still say he’s Chinese.  Only after the Chinese person points out that “no, he’s Korean,” will the white man say, “yeah, you’re right.”  This is a great power to have for the Chinese person because it’s another advantage they have over the white man besides mathematics and gambling instincts.

I wish I can give a description of how to identify other Asians, but I can’t.  It’s natural internal instincts, like a superpower.  The Chinese person, just knows.  It’s almost impossible to describe it to the Caucasian.  Believe me, I get asked all the time, “how can you tell?”  I figure that I have about a 90% success rate.  I still get some wrong at times.  The Southeast Asians are hard — those from Laos, Cambodia,  Philippines, etc.  You definitely have an advantage if you were born in the homeland.

Asians

If you want to test your own Asian instincts, here’s a good primer.

All Look Same

#3 Buffets

This is a biggie when it comes to the older generation. They will go and sit at a buffet for hours, I mean 3, 4, 5 hours at a time. Several times a week. What else do they have to do? I mean, they can stay at home and watch American TV, which by the way, they don’t understand. It’s funny how Chinese people always thinks they have to “get their moneys worth” when they go to buffets. First off, they find the best buffet deal around. It doesn’t matter if the food is good or not, they just want the bargain. If there’s a $5.99 buffet, they would much rather go to the one down the street for $4.99. Then, once they get in, they have to make sure they eat up every single penny’s worth of that $4.99. They hoard the over cooked stringy shrimp, they crush the non-tender piece of so called steak, and they load up on anything that contains seafood. Seafood at a buffet is like gold. If the seafood runs out, they’ll be there waiting for the next refill. And lastly, in terms of getting their moneys worth, Chinese people love to load up their plates and stuff themselves until they are on the last hole in their belt. They could be “full” three plates ago, but if they don’t eat that 7th plate of food, they will not feel like they got their moneys worth. This doesn’t apply to just the “big” Chinese people, but it also applies to those who are like a stick. You’ll be surprised at how many plates those skinnies can scarf down.

Buffet

#2 Electronics

Chinese people love electronics.

Have you ever been to a Chinese person’s house, in their car, or in their pockets?  At their house, you’ll find 6 TVs, 5 DVD players, 4 VCRs, 3 stereo systems, 3 computers or laptops, several game consoles like PS2, XBox, NintendoDS, a few digital cameras, and at least one calculator watch.  I mean it’s ridiculous.  Who needs a TV for every room?  One for the living room, one for the kitchen, one for the bedroom, one for the basement, one in the guest room and then one for the kid’s room.  Are you really going to watch TV in every room in the house… YES.  Not only will I have a TV in every room but I will also never through away the TV I bought 20 years ago.  Yes, that big heavy oversized tube TV that sits on top of a broken console TV.

Have you ever been inside a Chinese person’s car?  I bet that you’re not surprised that there’s a nice stereo system, some loud speakers, probably an iPod, a GPS system,  and an alarm system.  I wouldn’t be surprised if there were some lights around the license plates or under the car… but that probably belongs under the stufflatinopeoplelike blog.

Do you know a Chinese person who’s not an IT guy?  I can bet that he has a PDA type smart phone that has access to all his emails, to the internet to check sports scores, and  access to all his bank accounts.  Chinese people need access to all things, all the time.  If you don’t find this in their pocket, then it almost a lock that it’s clipped to their belt with a protector.

If you are white and you need some advice on electronics, go to Best Buy and talk to the Chinese guy or find one on the streets and ask him for recommendations.

Electronics for Dummies

#1 Chinese People love gambling

It’s only fitting that I start this blog off by describing Chinese peoples’ favorite pasttime – Gambling. There isn’t one thing a Chinese person wouldn’t rather be doing than gambling. It’s in the blood. If you’ve ever been to Las Vegas or Atlantic City or any casino, for that matter, you’ll notice that a majority of the people there are Chinese. If Chinese people didn’t love gambling, all casinos in the world would be out of business. It is evident by casinos tailoring their establishments to the Chinese. You’ll notice that there are special gambling sections for the Chinese. They have Chinese dealers that can speak every Chinese dialect just to service the Chinese gamblers. They have special Chinese fast food restaurants that serve noodles just for the Chinese. These so called fast food restaurants are created just so the Chinese gamblers can hurry back to the tables. If you’ve ever been to a chinese person’s house, it is highly likely that someone there IS playing Mahjongg or knows how to play Mahjongg.  Also, if you have a Chinese friend, there’s a high probability that he or she knows a bookie.  They will tell you what the spread is on every football game being played on Sunday.  Not only will they give you the spread, but he will also breakdown the game for you and tell you it’s a lock.  Gambling is in the blood, why else do you think the Chinese are so smart in Math?

One interesting tidbit. The MGM Grand in Vegas use to have a Sphinx at their main entrance. You know why they got rid of it? Because they were losing Chinese gamblers. Chinese gamblers are very superstitious and walking into the Sphinx’s mouth at the entrance meant that you were getting eaten, which means bad luck. The Chinese gamblers flocked the casino leading to the remodeling of the MGM.

MGM Grand Sphinx